caught me out yesterday. I was soaked.
Expect a sharp increase in the number of hips being soaked.
Kevin Keegan talks exclusively to The
Daily Harbinger about blocked drains.
and Posh book could be blocked
Beckham and the mother of his son Brooklyn are considering legal action
against author Andrew Morton who is considering writing a book about the
happy family. Mr Morton, best known for writing books about the Princess
of Wales and Monica Lewinsky said, "I wrote about Diana because she
was the People's Princess. I wrote about Monica because she was the President's
Mistress. Now I am writing about the Beckhams because they cause so much
to stop thin women
wants to introduce a new law that would effectively ban thin women. The
Minister for Women Tessa Jowell wants the media (including The Daily Harbinger)
to stop printing pictures of waifs in order to ease the pressure on young
girls to be thin. From April next year all women under eight stone will
be force fed GM crops specially grown to increase weight fast. All diets
will be banned and Weight Watchers will be classed as a terrorist organisation.
Victoria Spice claims she is thin because she lost weight after her first
child. The Government is also looking at the possibility of banning pregnancy
too just in case it does make women thinner.
England return home
The England football team returned home yesterday
from Belgium. And the only member of the party who could raise a smile
was coach Kevin Keegan - but then he is going back to work for ITV for
money. Phil Neville looked particularly hard done by, but then he did
give away a penalty in the dying seconds of English football. David Beckham
remained silent and did nothing very interesting, but we thought we'd
better mention him as this is the Beckham's Special edition of The Daily
The INSULT index was extremely fat and smelly. A bit
In the late edition of yesterday's Daily Harbinger
we ran a story claiming that the man who writes the Correction Column
had died. This was incorrect and we apologise for any embarrassment
or inconvenience caused.