Fans queue for latest read
Thousands of fans of The Daily Harbinger stayed up until midnight to be the first to read the latest edition of the popular paper. All over the UK, and in parts of America, newsagents and bookshops stayed open to allow their customer the chance to be the first to buy the latest edition. One shopper said, "I just can't get enough of it". It's thought that some of the shops took advantage of the late night opening offered customers the chance to buy the new Harry Potter book, but these reports are unconfirmed.

Minister breaks leg
Home Office minister Michael O'Brien has broken his leg while trying to stop an alleged shop lifter. Mr O'Brien said, "This have-a-go-hero stuff is quite dangerous. Last year I broke a rib trying to rescue a bee that was trapped in my garden shed and at Christmas I got my tongue stuck in the letterbox of a man who was thinking about voting for the Liberal Democrats. I think I'll leave this hero stuff to someone else".

Oasis split
Patsy Kensit has confirmed that she and her husband, Oasis singer Liam Gallagher, have separated. They've been joined at the hip for three years and have a son called Lennon. But Ms Kensit, who's done a bit of acting in her time, has told The Daily Harbinger that the marriage is over and that Liam has been surgically removed. "It's all over and I'm relieved." It's the third marriage to break down for Kensit, who is now planning to go for the record set by Elizabeth Taylor.