The North will
swap weather with the South
The pollen count
is 1,985,643, and that's just in one field.
Tomorrow in your Harbinger On Sunday Roger
Moore talks exclusively about rising damp.
Following yesterday's news that the tax office had 'lost' hundreds of
tax records, comes the news that the Inland Revenue's online site isn't
working. A spokesperson for the tax office said, "It's not a major
problem. We'll just take an extra £5 off everybody and some new
computers to replace the ZX81s we've been using".
hear the one about the Chief Inspector of Prisons?
are calls for the Chief Inspector of Prisons, Sir David Ramsbotham to
be sacked for making an "offensive" joke about Irish terrorists. The Home
Office refused to comment on Sir David's joke but 'comedian' Bernard Manning
said, "I think this is an outrage. I don't go around telling Mr Ramsbotham
how to do his job, so why is Mr Ramsbotham telling unfunny racist jokes?".
Mr Ramsbotham said, "It's a cracker."
and MI6 to open secret files
The Data Protection Commissioner has ordered the intelligence
services MI5 and MI6 to open their secret files. In a move that is sure
to send shockwaves through the corridors of power, members of the public
will be able to find out secrets about themselves that up until now only
the government has know. A spokesperson for MI5 said, "It's outrageous.
We've spent many years writing secret stuff about people and now any Tom
Dick or Harry can see what we've been saying. It's an invasion of our
The REPEAT index closed exactly the same as the previous
Sorry about the late arrival of today's Harbinger,
but I overslept.