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The Harbinger Digest 11 June 2000
 
 
In brief

Shark infested swimming pool cleared
A swimming pool full of sharks in Devon has been cleared.

Four men told not to come here again
Four men, one thought to resemble Prince Andrew, have been told not to come here anymore as your kind lower the tone of the place.

Dog wins lottery
A Yorkshire Terrier called Sonny has scooped £4.5 million on the National Lottery. His owner said that it wouldn't change Sonny's life one bit, but the rest of the family were going to buy everything.

Headline writer not dead
Peter Poster the leading headline writer, is said to be fit and well at his home in Bath. Earlier reports appear to have been wrong.
 
 
Bowl

Jippy tummy spoils first night
By Lance Waring - Theatre Correspondent

A man from York has spoken for the first time about how a planned night out at the theatre to see the premier of a Alan Ayckbourn play with his wife ended in disaster.

The man, Terry Connor, who does not want to be named, was all set to go out when he suddenly felt sick.

"I don't know what came over me", said Terry, "one minute I was getting dressed, the next I had my head in a bowl."

His wife, Kerry, who also wants to remain nameless, said: "We'd had a prawn curry the night before and I think they were off".

Water sold as petrol -
in Bristol of all places
Policemen and policewomen are looking for a garage and its owner who have been selling petrol instead of water. Inspector Les Avenue said: "This crime would never have come to light if one of the local tramps not complained that his nightcap tasted 'watered -down'".

Police want anyone with information about anything to call them anytime.

 
This week's Digest
 

Clinton weeps over dead turtle
>>

Jippy tummy spoils first night >>

Water sold as petrol in Bristol >>

How flip-flop killed my mother >>

Kidman and Cruise set to break records
>>

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